I was thinking about maybe getting in and "blogging" again and I found this post from back in Dec. That was never posted. I am not sure why, to be honest I don't remember writing it. At that time I was going though alot physically and waiting .... more like hanging on until my surgery date. But I decided that it still worth sharing. Because its true.
The LORD is my strength and my shield;
My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;
Therefore my heart greatly rejoices,
And with my song I will praise Him.
DRAFT 12/19/08 ~ As I sit here listening to Bing Crosbys White Christmas CD. I am surrounded by 1000s of tiny white christmas lights that make the room just glow. My baby is cozy and sleeping and the room is warmed by the wood stove. Its softly snowing outside, not enough to cause issues but just enough to make it pretty. There is an unusual calm and peace right now. I think it has more to do with my heart than my surroundings though.
God has brought me (and Marc) though so many things this last year. It feels as though we have lived a lifetime in only a year. A year ago today I would never have thought I would be sitting here feeling at peace with the direction that God is taking our lives.
Today I was going though an out of the way bookshelf, hoping to find a lost christmas CD when I found my old childhood bible. Along with the many memories that came to me as I went thought it, such as learning bible verses and attending church to be able to earn a bible of my very own. Looking at all the stickers that fill the inside cover that remind me that "Jesus loves me" and the many address changes that happened over the years. I found in my very young handwriting on the back inside cover asking the question "Do you have fullness of Joy?" WOW, I thought from the mouth of babes.. from the mouth or pen of me as a babe. When was the last time I really asked myself that or thought about that.
As I sit here now I know that my fullness of Joy is in Christ not in my surroundings and I am so thankful for the things that God has blessed me and my family with. I pray that in the future that when things are less "calm" that I will remember that my joy and peace and found in the Lord and not in my circumstances. Merry Christmas!